Archive for December, 2008
A Nerd’s Review of the Singer 7470
by Ego on Dec.05, 2008, under Llewellynguistics, Mustiness, NewSpew, Woodlewog
I was most excited about my wife’s and my recent decision to purchase a fancy new sewing machine. This has been an item of her desire for a long time and I fully support acquiring the tools to make her happy. (Though I am not so dim as to buy her, say, a vacuum cleaner for her birthday. We tend to both get excited over Dysons and I realize I would be getting it as much for me as her.)
She is incredibly artistic and handy and can knit or crochet absolutely anything in about two episodes of Dexter. (Offered into evidence: Teddy bears Campbell Brown and Lynley, knit from scratch.) 
When we lived in Brooklyn she used to actually knit bullet-proof vests for the officers in the local precinct. (That kevlar yarn was a beast to work with. She had to special-order 9-millimeter teflon-coated armor-piercing needles.) It’s impossible to calculate how many lives she must have saved over those harsh winters.
It became a friendly game that whenever I brought up the concept of acquiring a Kawasaki Ninja motorcycle, she would idly and codependently mention the fancy sewing machine. She apparently equated both items expensewise, and indeed I had no problem spending an equivalent amount on a Super-Duper Sewing Computer that she would coax to weave colorful rugs and darn life-size presidential portraits and such. But the model she wanted was much more modest. In reality the Ninja (itself a very modest 250cc) would cost about 10 times the Singer. Talk about a guilt trip.
Anyway, now the Singer has arrived, and I assume I have the Ninja green light, which coincidentally, is the desired color! Yay!
(Important Note to Wife and Sister and Concerned Readers: Relax. The above paragraph employed poetic license purely for entertainment purposes. There is no money for silly dangerous toys. I am not running out to buy a motorcycle anytime soon. Likely never.) Unyay. 
The Big Day
We opened the carton together, with equal anticipation. Oh-boy, oh-boy, oh-boy! You know, it’s programmable with little patterns, and that’s a big turn-on.
